life lessons

  • You Don’t Need Fixed

    You Don’t Need Fixed

    I grew up in a time when you could turn on the news and hear people tell you, plainly, that if you were an LGBTQ+ young person, something about you was wrong. Not misunderstood. Not still figuring it out. Wrong. And it wasn’t quiet. It was said out loud, in living rooms, on television, in…

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  • Thirty Eight Seconds

    Thirty Eight Seconds

    I don’t talk about this very often. It’s not because I’m trying to keep it private. It’s just one of those things that doesn’t come up in normal conversation, and honestly, I’ve never felt the need to turn it into something bigger than what it was. I was on the operating table when I died.…

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  • I Was Here

    I Was Here

    Someday the world will wake up and I will no longer be here. Morning will come the way it always does. Coffee will be made. People will go to work. The quiet machinery of daily life will keep moving forward without noticing that one more voice has gone silent. That is the simple truth of…

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  • The Performance of Survival

    School should be a safe place for all kids regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, or anything else that might make them different from others. That is the ideal people like to talk about. But the truth is that it is not and never really has been. Growing up, I understood something very clearly even…

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  • Eyes Open. Heart Steady.

    Eyes Open. Heart Steady.

    If you live in this world long enough, you are going to live through some type of instability. I know I have. I could list them out. Hate crimes. Civil unrest. Moments that remind you how quickly things can shift. I remember Ferguson. I remember fire trucks parked across streets like makeshift barricades. I remember…

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  • Coming Out

    Coming Out

    Here’s something I’ve learned over the years. Coming out is not a one time event. It is not just something gay people do. It is something we all do, over and over again, in different ways, throughout our lives. We just do not always call it that. Coming out is what happens when you finally…

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  • I Did My Best

    I Did My Best

    These are thoughts from the quiet moments in the morning, from a night that was too long. Sometimes the quiet in the early morning gets loud enough that I finally let myself say it. Not out of frustration. Not as a defense. Just because it is true. I did my best. I was a very…

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  • We the People?

    We the People?

    I keep thinking about how different things might feel if we actually lived in a country of ideas. A place where “We the People” meant everyone. Not some of us. Not the protected. Not the powerful. Just all of us. But we never have. And that truth stings more than I want to admit. What…

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  • A Calm Blueprint for Uncertain Times

    These are unsettled times. That does not mean panic. It means paying attention. When the information environment is noisy and trust is thin, the most responsible thing people can do is quietly steady their footing. Preparedness is not fear driven. It is how adults reduce stress, protect their families, and keep options open when uncertainty…

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  • The Emotional Pandemic

    The Emotional Pandemic

    This morning I sat down to write and worked on a few things. The grammar was right and the punctuation was right. The sentences did exactly what they were supposed to do, and that was the problem. None of it felt like me. It felt like I was behaving on the page, keeping things in…

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