family
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Lately, I’ve been feeling the weight of time. It’s hitting me that I’ve lived more years than I probably have left, and no matter how I try to shake it, the truth stays. One day, I won’t be here. And that day is coming faster than I ever imagined. One morning, people who love me…
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The other day I was going through some old family photos and came across a picture of one of my great grandfathers. I stopped and just stared at it. The truth is, I know almost nothing about him. I didn’t even know he ran a small store in the Soulard area of St. Louis. That’s…
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When I was raising my three children as a single gay father in a small Midwestern town, I had to hide being gay. It wasn’t something I ever wanted to do, it was something I had to do. I had come out at 29 to the people in my life who truly mattered, but to…
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Life isn’t supposed to be a series of “gotcha” moments. You know the kind—those little traps people set in conversations, waiting for someone to slip up just so they can say, “Aha! I caught you.” In healthy relationships, that kind of behavior doesn’t belong. But in dysfunctional families, it can become the norm. I lived…
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I hate secrets. It’s true—I always have. All my life, I’ve struggled with secrets, especially keeping them. It’s just not how I live. Very early in adulthood, I realized how important it was not to live in secrecy. Some of you who know me might say, “But you were in a straight marriage.” That’s true—I…
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When I was little, my mom told me she was going to redecorate my room. I remember the thrill of choosing paint swatches—so deep a royal blue it felt like diving into the night sky. As the first coats went on, the room took on a hushed glow, and we pressed glow‑in‑the‑dark stars into the…
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Each year, Easter meets me in a different place. This year, I needed to write through the noise—to return to what’s real, to what still rises. This is that reflection.
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As Good Friday arrives, I find myself grieving not just the crucifixion of Jesus, but the crucifixion of everything He stood for. In a world where religion is being twisted into a weapon, and hate is preached in the name of love, I wrote this letter to God. It is a cry for truth, for…
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Alexander Leon once said, “Queer people don’t grow up as ourselves; we grow up playing a version of ourselves that sacrifices authenticity to minimize humiliation and prejudice.” Those words have always resonated with me, capturing the challenges I faced growing up queer. Early on, I learned to conceal parts of my true self—my interests, my…